the game's afoot!

[fortheliving]

Harry is really, really glad he didn't go into some depressive fit thing after Susan... you know.

He considered it. It was very tempting. But in the end... what good would it have done? Susan wouldn't want him to do it. Hell, if she'd popped out of the woodwork and he hadn't left the house in four months she'd probably have slapped him. So he forced himself to get his boots on every day and do his damn job. He found lost things. He worked on improving a few of his foci and enchanted objects and stuff. Cries most nights, but doesn't admit it, and that's been getting better. Recently he took a job protecting some kind of monastery from monkey demons.

A factor relevant to that particular job is currently napping in his coat pocket. He found the puppy there afterwards and tried to call that monk dude, but the monastery seemed to have vanished. Which was weird. But he got the puppy vetted by Bob and Father Forthill, and they said the little guy wasn't some kind of hellspawn, so... he kept him. Called him Mouse. Let him nap in his coat pocket. Mister got along with him, because Mouse wasn't big enough to be a threat to the big cat's authority.

Anyway, Mouse is napping in his coat pocket, and Harry just got out of the morgue looking at a corpse. He's pretty sure this is the work of some White Court bastard. The victim doesn't have a mark on him, but he's got the dopiest grin in human history. And Harry, being Harry, knows from dopey grins. So Harry sets out looking for a White Court vampire. Thomas doesn't know of any of his cousins who'd have gone after this guy (their official victims are dumped in a nearby quarry, apparently), so he's out investigating the red light district. And trying to look like someone who would be interested in a prostitute, instead of someone who would rather cut off his testicles with a spoon than lay a finger on a member of the oldest profession.

Comments

[no_return]

"You know," he says, "I don't think you're a cop. Dunno why. I just have this feeling."

[fortheliving]

"You'd be right about that. I work with them sometimes. Sometimes, not so much. And it's only for the big stuff. Stuff like people's hearts exploding out of their chests. Or showing up dead without a mark on them and a big smile. That kind of thing."

[no_return]

"...People's hearts explode out of their chests? That's a thing that happens?"

[fortheliving]

"Yep. Very gruesome. Happened a couple years back. Turned out somebody had used an obscure magical ritual to kill them in a big way. Magic being a thing that exists, as I'm sure you're aware. Now, the other thing, that's more common. Usually some White Court vampire loses control of their powers and sucks out some poor bastard's soul. It's apparently very pleasant for the victim, apart from the results."

[no_return]

"Wow. So that's what that is," he says. "Sucking out people's souls, really? You're not just messing with me?"

[fortheliving]

"Souls are weird. The effect on the body manifests as a massive heart attack, but it's because of that. Didn't anybody teach you about the vampire birds and the vampire bees?"

[no_return]

"Man, nobody even taught me about the vampires. Nobody taught me shit."

[fortheliving]

"...Seriously? Why would you not teach a kid about their own freaking species? That- does not make sense. But... I guess a lot of parenting styles don't make sense."

Like, oh, throwing rocks at a ten-year-old until he can manifest a shield strong enough to keep them out. Or- other things.

[no_return]

"My parents were assholes. I ran away from home. Anyway. Did you actually come to tell me off for killing that guy, or what?"

[fortheliving]

"I came to make sure you didn't kill anybody else. At the time, that looked like threatening or killing you. Right now, it's looking more like giving you your vampire starter pack and telling you to stick to third base or below."

[no_return]

"I mean, I don't go around fucking people to death for kicks," he says. "I've figured that much out. But, y'know, sometimes a guy won't take no for an answer..." He shrugs.

[fortheliving]

"Okay, I feel less bad about that guy being dead. D'you want... I don't know, a stipend or something for living expenses so you don't have to hook anymore? Because I can do that."

[no_return]

"That'd sure be nice of you!"

[fortheliving]

"Okay," Harry sighs. "I just... sorry. About that. There's other jobs you can get for feeding, you know. You could do massage, or something. At a parlor that isn't actually a brothel."

[no_return]

"I dunno. Most of the time I like this one. And it doesn't require, like, qualifications. It's easy."

[fortheliving]

"How can you like a job that gets you sexually assaulted on a regular basis?"

[no_return]

He laughs. "I like it when I'm not getting sexually assaulted, obviously!"

[fortheliving]

"If I had a job that I liked that got me severely injured all the time, I'd- wait, I do. That's a bad example."

[no_return]

"See, you do understand!"

[fortheliving]

"But I'm getting hurt in the name of justice! You're doing it in the name of- orgasms, I guess. It's not the same thing!"

[no_return]

"Orgasms are nice!"

[fortheliving]

"Yes, but it's not as noble as saving people's lives. I guess your mileage may vary on that."

[no_return]

"So that's what you do? Save people's lives?"

[fortheliving]

"Well, generally I find lost cats. But in between that, I save people's lives, yeah. I did stop that heart-exploding guy, if you'll recall. And the enormous wolf that was devouring people, and the ghost that was destroying people's brains. All in a day's work. Citizen."

[no_return]

He giggles.

"Well, good for you, I guess. I mean, saving people's lives isn't bad. It's just probably not as much fun as sex."